Want oral pleasure fair oaks

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Oral sex is ubiquitous in pornography—especially fellatio. As a result, pornography has introduced many people to oral sex, shown them the basics of performing it, and helped make oral sex not only culturally acceptable, but also something many people assume is a routine element in partner sex. But only Want oral pleasure fair oaks one-quarter said they played orally the last time they had sex before being surveyed. A similar survey by University of California researchers shows that only about half of respondents recalled giving or receiving oral sex during the 12 months before they were surveyed.

Other surveys show that socioeconomic status predicts willingness to engage in oral sex. As education and income increase, so does comfort with oral sex. This may cause relationship conflict, but no one should feel coerced into oral play. Here are some suggestions:. Men feel similarly. Some love providing it, while others feel reluctant or refuse. In fact, many men love to provide oral. Some women feel reluctant to receive oral sex because they are convinced their genitals are unattractive or malodorous. For women who deal with used tampons and vaginal infections, that part of the body may not seem like the most attractive place.

According to leading gynecologists, women should not douche. The fragrance and taste of the vulva and vagina depend on several factors: personal hygiene, genital health, the menstrual cycle if the woman is premenopausal, and the extent of vaginal lubrication loss and atrophy if she is postmenopausal. Discuss this. Women may also insert a tampon or diaphragm to catch the flow.

Menopausal changes may also affect vaginal fragrance and taste. As vaginal lubrication subsides, normal vaginal microorganisms may not be flushed out. In addition, one of the lesser known changes of menopause is vaginal atrophy, thinning of the vaginal membrane. In most women, regular washing and use of a vaginal lubricant eliminates any problem. However, if a woman feels self-conscious, try a flavored lubricant. And if a man has any objections, he can suck on a mint lifesaver while providing oral caresses. But in the vast majority of women of any age, the vulva smells and tastes fine—and men are happy—eager—to provide oral caresses.

Basic cunnilingus involves licking the vulva from the vaginal opening to the clitoris. As women become sexually aroused, their outer vaginal lips fill with extra blood, which parts them somewhat, exposing the inner lips and the sensitive tissue between them.

The tongue is much softer than fingers, so it can provide the gentlest possible stimulation of the clitoris and vulva.

Want oral pleasure fair oaks

Is that okay? Or you might coax her butt to the side of the bed and kneel on the floor to lick her. Begin slowly—and very gently. Start by nuzzling, kissing, and licking her inner thighs and the area around her vulva. Anticipation of cunnilingus can feel very arousing to women. As you move toward her genitals, begin by licking the fleshy outer lips. Run your tongue up and down them. Nibble them gently with your lips. Next, work your tongue in between the outer lips to caress the smaller, thinner inner lips. Then circle the vaginal opening Want oral pleasure fair oaks perhaps insert your tongue—or a finger or two—inside her vagina.

Lick very gently. They go at the vulva like a dog dying of thirst. As a result, some men infer that intense, rapid-fire tongue play is the way to go. Check in with the woman. Many women prefer very gentle oral caresses at first, and then some more intensity as they become highly aroused and approach orgasm. Then check in periodically after that. Preferences change, or she may just be in the mood for something a little different.

Approach the clitoris very slowly and gently. Others find direct clitoral licking too intense, even uncomfortable. They prefer it when the tongue only lightly caresses the clitoris or circles it, which stimulates it but less directly. Some women feel reluctant to discuss their reactions to oral sex. Some women produce fluid on orgasm. This is also an issue for many men. Another issue is the possibility of the lover ingesting some of this fluid.

Discuss your feelings about this. Many men enjoy being very close to the vulva as the woman ejaculates, and have no problem ingesting some of the fluid.

Want oral pleasure fair oaks

Female ejaculate is not urine, though it may contain some dilute urine. This is normal. If not her clitoris, perhaps her vaginal lips or vaginal opening. Or come up from between her legs and hold her, kiss her, and massage her any way she likes. And most women can be more varied and creative with their lips and tongues than with their vaginas. That makes most women gag and feel used. But with the man on his back and the woman above him, she has a great deal of control and can be as playful and creative as she likes. Many women enjoy that—as well as seeing how much their lovers enjoy fellatio.

Just like women, many men feel self-conscious about their genitals. Meanwhile many women feel reluctant—or unable—to provide oral sex. Some worry than he might accidentally urinate during fellatio. Some women feel repulsed by having semen squirted into their mouths. Others rebel against the idea of swallowing it. If a woman is adamantly opposed to providing fellatio, her feelings should be respected.

Every man should wash his penis and scrotum with soap and water whenever he bathes or showers. Men who are not circumcised should retract the foreskin and wash its inner skin. If a man neglects this, dirt and bacteria build up that may make the penis smell and taste foul—and increase risk of transmitting sexual infections.

Fellatio is as simple as eating a banana—without using your teeth. Start by kissing the head of his penis.

Want oral pleasure fair oaks

Next lightly part your lips and lick the head and the corona, the little ridge around the base of the head. Then take the head into your mouth, using your lips and tongue to caress it and the cornona—particularly the frenulum, the part of the corona on the underside of the head. Eventually, move your head up and down so that your lips caress as much of the shaft as you can comfortably take in your mouth.

However, the shaft is considerably less sensitive than the head, corona, and frenulum, so return frequently to these sensitive places—unless the man asks for something different. But gentle requests are usually more welcome than terse commands. No one likes to feel ordered around. About using teeth Want oral pleasure fair oaks fellatio: Many men prefer lips and tongue only, no teeth. However, the erect penis is a tough little organ, so light nibbling with teeth along the shaft are unlikely to cause harm.

Ask if the man is open to this. The pornographic film, Deep Throat, invented a character whose clitoris was supposedly located in her throat. Deep Throat became the first—and virtually only—X-rated movie to break out of the porn ghetto and play to mainstream audiences. The problem is that deep throating—and even a good deal of ordinary fellatio—triggers gagging. Stick anything too far down the throat, and the body gags. There are several ways to deal with this:.

Many women are happy to accept semen in their mouths, and have no problem with the taste of semen or swallowing it. There are several reasons why women might not want men to ejaculate into their mouths. Some fear injury from the force of ejaculation. And some object to swallowing semen, preferring to spit it out. Women need not fear injury from the force of ejaculation. It feels more like chewing that brand of gum with the liquid center. As you bite down on this gum, the liquid squirts out, but gently.

Respect her sexual boundaries. If a woman would rather not have semen in her mouth, the couple might compromise on fellatio with the man using a condom. That way he can ejaculate inside her mouth, but not into it.

The beverage can help the semen go down easier. But if a woman would rather not swallow, that personal preference should be respected. In porn, the women rarely swallow. Instead, they make a great show of letting semen dribble out of their mouths and massaging it into their skin. This can be quite an erotic sight. It is possible for a man to give a woman gonorrhea this way. However, the AIDS virus is unlikely to spread orally, unless the woman has bleeding gums or a sore that allows semen-to-blood contact. To eliminate fear of spreading STIs, get tested and treated if you have any.

Or wear a condom during fellatio—and intercourse. She withdraws her mouth and strokes your erection with two well-lubricated hands until you ejaculate. Some women who are fine with accepting semen in their mouths complain about its taste, and as a result, are reluctant to provide oral sex, or allow men to ejaculate into their mouths, or swallow semen. An extensive search of the medical literature and the Internet turned up no reliable research on this subject—but no shortage of opinions. However, many women contend otherwise, insisting that what the man eats and drinks makes a ificant difference in the taste of his semen.

One-time porn star, Annie Sprinkle, who claims to have tasted the semen of 1, men, says vegetarians taste best, that drinking fruit juices improves the taste, and that smoking, alcohol, meats, and asparagus make semen taste worse. Internet discussions of the taste of semen generally agree that a diet high in fruit and fruit juices, especially pineapple and apple juice, sweeten the taste of semen. They also generally agree on the list of foods that purportedly foul its taste: asparagus which makes sense because of its well-known ability to alter the aroma of urinebroccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, deep fried foods, meats, dairy foods, alcohol, and coffee, plus one nonfood item, cigarettes.

In fact, increasing consumption of fruit and decreasing meats, fried foods, alcohol and cigarettes is good for health. Women who go this route tout peppermint and wintergreen lifesavers. If a woman swallows, she need not worry about her waistline. Estimates vary, but most suggest that the typical ejaculation contains only 15 to 25 calories. The reason is usually that oral caresses, while sublime, may not provide enough of the kind of stimulation the Want oral pleasure fair oaks needs to trigger orgasm.

A combination of oral attention to the head of the penis plus vigorous stroking the shaft by hand is usually sufficient to trigger ejaculation. Some men really enjoy the combination of light, feathery lip and tongue action with tight-grip shaft stroking. For different, possibly preferable sensations, the woman might wear a glove on her hand.

For individualized help dealing with oral sex issues, consult a sex therapist. In the beginning of our marriage, washing up as a courtesy rarely happened.

Want oral pleasure fair oaks

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The Psychology of Fellatio