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Pediatric Nursing, Psychiatric and Surgical Issues. Family is expressed as a social league with vital characteristics within a limited extent, which is based on an emotional commitment within a framework of solidarity that cannot be transferred to others [ 2 ]. Such a family is the fundamental factor in the emotional, social and moral development of the. In sum, a complete family is a natural environment where the child is socialized in the broadest sense [ 3 ]. This different point of view on family also caused the parenthood to be considered as something independent of marriage.
It has been stated that the differentiation of the point of view on marriage and having children when compared to the past is associated with the developments in technology [ 4 ]. It is too optimistic to expect the two different individuals with various personality traits who were raised in different environments to be always in harmony for years, since a family which is an institution considered to be a harbour against the challenges of life may, itself, sometimes turn into a a stormy ocean and create problems instead of solving them, in which case the spouses end up with the decision to terminate their association and get divorced, which is, today, experienced more and more in increasing s [ 1 ].
The widowed spouse, when compared with a divorced one, can get married and start a family much more easily; thus, the child can regain a natural environment once again [ 3 ]. having an extramarital mother will never have had a complete family. Different from the traditional families, parents in modern families focus all their financial and emotional sources along with all their attention and energy on raising children. It is argued that the social changes, such as conceiving out of wedlock, or even the technological innovations like bearing through medium of sperm banks independent of the prospective father lead to a change in the point of view towards marriage and parenthood.
It is now pointed out that a woman does not have just because she is married, and that having is not a marriage routine anymore but a decision independently made by the woman. In the wake of such changes, it Separated dad needs sex it s been months also stated that the emotional value of the child, different from that of the traditional families, has increased even more.
The most dramatic change of all the others within a family life throughout the twentieth century is said to have been the rapid increase in the divorce rate [ 4 ]. The divorce rate is the highest in the males and females aged betweenwhile this rate is the lowest in those aged between Almost half of the marriages end up with divorce.
The divorce rates have been on the increase since the beginning of 20th century, and particulary since s. According to Brown et al.
Now 3 out of 10 children are living in single-parent homes [ 5 ]. It is seen that there has also been a great increase in the divorce rate in Turkey in recent years. According to the data of the State Statistics Institute SSIthe divorce rate, starting from the years s, have been on the increase to a great extent. The of the married couples getting divorced in increased at a rate of 1. The rough divorce rate was 1. Still, the divorce rates in our country are seen to be quite lower than those in several European countries.
However, it is thought that the divorce rates seen to have increased particularly in big cities in recent years have been remarkable, and for this reason, it is important that divorce and the effects of divorce on individuals and the society be analyzed [ 4 ].
There are, undoubtfully, a of reasons for the rapid increase in divorce rates. There are also various and major consequences of divorces, among which, as the sociologists and academicians put forth, is the case of shaking the society to its foundations. The case of a divorce is a blow inflicted on the self-confidence and self-respect of both the female and the male.
Divorce is not a process experienced only between spouses. Most of the couples who are divorced have children, as well; therefore, a divorce is also quite an important process for the. It is pointed out that a divorce potentially brings with it a series of changes that may seriously affect the. The first step in this challenging process is to explain to the child what divorce means. No child deserves to be left to confront such a devastating behaviour.
How to tell the child about the decision to get divorced:. The parents should explain to their child Separated dad needs sex it s been months their decision to get divorced in a secure and familiar environment the child is used to and should act together in this if possible. They should be totally honest in explaining the matter and use a comprehensible language by considering their age. The children should be listened to when they ask questions, the answers given should be limited to what is asked about and no long explanations should be included.
While parents are having a conversation with their child renthey should avoid any mutual argument, nor should they blame each other in front of the. should never be regarded as a fellow sufferer or a shoulder to cry on. Remember that your task of being a parent to them remains the same; what they need is your parenthood. The fact that the divorce takes place only between the father and the mother should particularly be emphasized. Divorce is both a judicial and a psychological and social process. It is the life-style that may be traumatic for children and is unavoidable for some marriages [ 2 ].
When taken as a judicial concept, divorce, to put it simply, is the termination of a marriage contract [ 1 ]. Some of them, by putting aside their personal desires, consider continuing their marriage until their kids grow up and leave home. The research have suggested that staying together merely for the sake of their children rarely works. Sometimes staying together for this reason becomes more harmful for the children of those keeping together than the children of those getting divorced due to discrepancy.
In short, sometimes the only way that seems to solve the problem could be to end the marriage [ 1 ].
The Divorce Process: It was found that the determining factor associated with divorce was the emotional and behavioural problems of spouses, and that the quality of marriage, the socio-economic conditions, postpartum depression and demographic changes were not the determinants for that matter. It was seen that divorce takes place within an average of 3-year-process in between the decision to divorce and the divorce itself. It was determined that the children of the families living together after divorce had more adaptation problems compared to those whose families get married again [ 7 ].
The children also undergo similar stages as their parents do [ 7 ]. The Denial Stage of Divorce: At this stage, the children cannot accept the experiences associated with the divorce. They do not want to accept the separation of their parents. They cannot believe that their father and mother can care for them anymore; instead, they would rather believe that their parents will reunite.
At this stage, it is important that parents deal with their discrepancies between each other in a proper way without ignoring the issues agreed upon and be clear about the child care period, as well. The reactions of denial and avoidance exhibited by the child can be overcome through an open communication.
The denial is followed by the accusation phase. This stage usually lasts for a short time and does not necessitate a clinical intervention [ 7 ]. Acceptance Stage: The fact that divorce is a proper solution for parents is ensured by showing that the divorced parents now have individually happier lives compared to the one they had together.
It may sometimes be possible to reach this stage during young adulthood. In the process of the ending relationship, often more intense and complicated emotions occur. Reconciliation in the wake of a divorce does not mean a reunion. It is the process in which the painful and challenging aspects of the relationship are integrated through experience and are no more obstacles against proceeding with life. The old and sorrowful processes are settled and the journey to the areas of new relationships goes on [ 7 ].
The researches carried out among children suggest that children do not accept the case of divorce; instead, they prefer a miserable marriage to a divorce [ 2 ]. On the other hand, divorce is, doubtlessly, rather a challenging and stressful process for both children and their parents. Divorce, besides the changes taking place in the relationship of the patients, is quite important in terms of the parental roles of the divorced couples.
When we analyze divorce in terms of parents, we encounter several problems to be coped with, such as re-building a new life following the divorce, developing new ways of contact with both the Separated dad needs sex it s been months and the children, and additionally, the financial hardships occurring in the life of the divorced mother and the changes in social relationships [ 4 ]. One of the psychological variables that may cause a risk for the divorce of parents is the life satisfaction. Life satisfaction comprises the cognitive aspect of the concept of subjective well-being used as a synonym with happiness in the field of positive psychology.
The conducted studies suggest that as the positive relationships of the adolescents with their parents increase along with the increase in the positive attitudes of a mother-father, commitment to parents and the socio-economic level, so does the life satisfaction escalate with such aspects. As a matter of fact, the limited of studies analyzing the life satisfaction of the children with divorced and undivorced parents show that the life satisfaction and general well-being levels of the children coming from broken families are lower than those coming from complete families.
For this reason, the balance should be maintained well, and the children should not be allowed to experience such borderline problems. In the wake of separation or divorce, the parents should not speak out against each other, nor should they reflect any problem they may be having with each other on the. Such is the case commonly seen in divorced families, which may bring major problems with it. After the divorce, the child will start living with this single parent, which is usually the mother in such cases.
Therefore, major changes take place in the relationship between the child and the father who has left home after divorce. Thus, it is required that both the mother and the father, after having been divorced, adapt to the new circumstances while maintaining their relationship with their children and re-structure this relationship for their new life-style [ 4 ]. Many children but the little ones know what divorce means due to Separated dad needs sex it s been months fact that the termination of marriages today is a commonly-seen incident.
If there is tension and unhappiness within a family, it is greatly likely that the children within that family circle become aware of the fact that something is going wrong. Within the families where fightings, particularly the physical violence and alcoholism are often seen, the children learn to read the psychological states of their parents without any awareness. They can find the best time to approach an angry or an unhappy parent by starting from various details. In the same way, they know when to get away from the clamour. Once the incident breaks out-which often happens with one of the parents leaving home-the child literally gets shocked.
Drifting away from a parent, even if it may be an abusive one, horrifies. It is natural for to miss the parent who left the family. The best time to explain the case of divorce to children should be at least one week before the day when one of the spouses will leave home, since the children will have quite a lot of questions and worries preoccupying their mind once they have got the news [ 1 ].
Witnessing the loss of love between parents, the abandonment of matrimonial obligations by parents, getting used to travelling between two different homes and the feeling of daily absence of a parent while living with the other one all cause new familial circumstances for the. Brown et al. The parents of the children with severe or chronic diseases may confront a higher risk of divorce. The data regarding the effect of the diagnosis of with a chronic disease on the marriage relationship are inadequate.
As the result of the research, the reasons supporting a negative impact involve the communication problems, increased role tension, decreased relationship satisfaction and spending less time with a parent [ 5 ]. Syse et al. They found out that when the educational levels of the mothers having children with cancer were higher than the average, the divorce rates in those parents proved to be higher, as well [ 5 ]. Anxiety may manifest itself in children in the form of different reactions.
Some children withdraw in order to avoid any worrying situation and abstain from ing any groups of their peers, while others develop defense mechanisms, such as retreat, rejection, repression and projection [ 2 ]. The short-term adaptation of the child towards divorce: This is the adaptation process within the first few years. In consequence of the inner conflicts they experience, they may suffer from fear, sorrow, anger, guilt, loneliness, rejection, sense of being unloved, and physical problems like stomachache, headache and chest pain, and psychosomatic disorders like oversleeping and overeating, particularly within the first year following the divorce [ 9 ].
The long-term adaptation of the child towards divorce: This period starts after the first two years following the divorce and may continue until adulthood. In general, the adaptation to the process of change experienced within the family is provided in this process. The vulnerability that a divorce creates on the child is associated with, particularly, age, gender, the stress level experienced within the family in the divorce process and whether the parental functions are sufficiently fulfilled or not [ 9 ].
Children, either at very young ages or in late adolescence, are influenced less by the long-term negative effects of divorce when compared with the other periods of age [ 9 ]. The children of the divorced parents experience a much more challenging process during adolescence when several developmental changes are being experienced, such as acquiring a social, sexual and occupational identity, having the capacity of getting independent, acquiring competence and being able to establish close relationships.
It is reported that in comparison to the adolescents in the undivorced families, the risk of getting expelled from school, antenuptial conception and exhibiting antisocial actions increased times more in those with the divorced parents [ 10 ]. The comparative studies conducted on the matter suggest that the children with divorced or separated parents, compared to those living with their families, develop a distrustful way of commitment towards their parents, and that their tendency to exhibit instant rage, constant rage, self-accusation, desperateness, depression and the tendency to commit suicide is higher than the others.
The social adaptation, self-esteem and psychological resilience levels of those with divorced parents were found to be lower [ 8 ]. While some research suggest that boys are much more influenced by a divorce when compared to girls, other research show that this is just the other way round. A ificant difference was determined between the levels of anxiety in terms of the genders of children whose parents were not divorced.
As is seen, it is impossible to make generalizations as to how the act of divorce influences children, since each divorce case is indeed a unique, complex and multi-faceted event. Babies and those in their infancy feel the pain whenever they are separated from their parents. They may react to such changes by crying, clinging or showing bad tempers [ 11 ]. A great deal of closeness should be shown as much as possible, both verbally and physically.Separated dad needs sex it s been months
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The Psychological Problems Seen in the Children of Divorced Parents and the Nursing Approach Concerning These Problems